Chapter 16

• “I need to explain my reasons. I don’t blindly do what he says ... I have my own mind. Please don't be like this. I’m trying to move us forward.” He also slumps down on top of a rock not far from me and mirrors my pose, dropping his legs over the edge as we sit facing each other across the clearing in what seems like a vast gulf between us. All my hopes of reuniting with passion and lust, dying a hefty death, and depressing me even more.
• “So explain and let me go back to my exciting solitude and imprisonment. I’m totally missing out on the adventures of the day meeting you here.” It's sarcastic and drenched in bitterness that even shocks me, and I flinch at how nasty and cold I sound, but it’s the pure frustration at the predicament we find ourselves in. Realizing my hurt feelings are getting the better of me, I try to swallow it back and throw him a wary look fleetingly. I catch him out of the corner of my eye frowning and then looking down at his swaying feet, regret all over his face that pains me all the more for my hostility.
• “I'm doing what’s best for the future of the pack ... all of them. You included. I care what happens to all of us. My father was right, and my mate needs to be worthy to lead by my side one day. We need a strong Luna with pure blood. A warrior who can rise in battle if needed, and we both know that’s not you. The vampires won’t stay down forever. They’ll rise in my reign, if not before. I need to think of our kind and not what my soul craves. Distance is best, and in time, maybe we’ll learn to live without it consuming us the way it is now. We have to be practical and think of my responsibility with who I am. It’s a heavy weight I’ve carried my whole life ... it’s not yours to share. I need someone like Carmen, with strong gifts and a thirst for blood when the time comes. She’s a warrior ... you’re a land child. Your family was growers, gatherers ... not hunters, not killers. It is what it is.” His whole manner and tone are low and apologetic, a slight rasp to his voice, and he can’t seem to look me in the eye. I can't speak as his words choke my throat almost closed. My eyes fill with warm tears that blur everything in front of me. Wounded by something I already know as factual, at being weak blooded and nothing close to a leader, but it still stings to hear him say it so directly.