Chapter 56 Missed Calls

• I firmly believe that since I allowed it, I have received all the kisses and caresses that I never received, the ones I always dreamed of but never got; just as I also gave all that love that was inside me, locked away, begging to be given to someone. Last night I felt loved, desired, valued for who I am, with my flaws, with my doubts and insecurities. Last night I saw stars, fireworks, and possibly a nuclear explosion.
• I felt unique and irreplaceable, and the sounds he made, how he trembled, his tone when he whispered to me, were the icing on the cake. He was happy with me; I didn't have to do anything else but be myself, he had told me that several times, but only today did I accept it and understand it. Of course, it wasn't just all passion and overflow, I also felt respected, cared for. It was something I never had and never imagined having.
• The fear of falling in love still lingered, but could I avoid it? Perhaps this wouldn't go beyond this, perhaps I wouldn't experience that love I longed for. But it was the best I had ever had, much better, and once you taste it, I suppose it's hard to desire less. There isn't even anything I can compare it to because I had never felt anything like it, not even imagined.