Chapter 208

• Either I wanted them or I didn’t, but with Jes it’s different. He makes me understand Abbie in a way I never have before. She has a deep affection for the men she dates but she is not in love with any of them, yet she cares for them and she has sex with them. Until I met Jesten I could never understand that, but now I think I do. He makes me laugh and he calls me every couple of days, either with a dirty joke or to arrange coffee or something and, if he doesn’t call me, I do notice it … but it doesn’t bother me, weird.
• Back to Mr Stanton—did we have a moment last night or was that wishful thinking on my part. How did it go from him comforting me, to me jacking him off in the shower and then him being wrapped around me affectionately all night? He said before that he never stayed with me because he couldn’t say goodbye to me. Was that the case this morning or was he just dying to chew his arm off to get out of there without waking me up? I rub my hands over my face in frustration. Joshua Stanton, you are a total mindfuck … welcome back!
• Joshua