Chapter 4 I Feel Nothing For Her

• During the early hours in Seattle, Rebecca and Peter decided to end the night with friends.
• "Friend, thank you for everything. I love you and it's great to be back. Let's go out on the weekend, what do you think? Just us girls!"
• "Great idea! I'm excited to catch up. Now, go with your boyfriend. It seems like he has plans for you."
• "What plans? Stop with this mystery. You know I don't like it," she asked, curious.
• "Come on, friend. It's time to have fun. You know very well what you two have been planning while you were at MIT and exchanging naughty messages. I bet he just anticipated a few things!" Melissa smiled, observing Rebecca's embarrassment. "Enjoy the night, friend." She walked away towards the other friends, spotting Peter approaching.
• "Ready, baby? Shall we go?" Rebecca forced a smile and followed him. During the journey to Peter's apartment, she felt apprehensive, unsure if she was ready for what she was imagining. Peter interrupted her thoughts with a question. "Love, you seem distracted. What's wrong?"
• "Sorry, it's nothing. I'm just tired from the trip." When they arrived at the apartment, a table decorated for a candlelit dinner awaited them. "Wow, how beautiful. Did you prepare this?"
• "Yes, everything for you, my love. I was looking forward to this night. I just didn't expect that we would have dinner with your parents and that the party would go on for so long." Peter approached and kissed her for several minutes. "Let's leave the dinner for tomorrow. Go take a shower. You must be exhausted. I'll take care of everything here."
• Rebecca agreed and went to the bedroom. She packed her things and entered the shower. As the water flowed, she reflected for several minutes on whether she should move forward with Peter. At that moment, she questioned her feelings, wondering if she truly loved him. Still wrapped in a towel in the bedroom, she wondered if she was ready. Just as she was about to put on her nightgown, Peter entered and hugged her from behind.
• "It's so good to have you here, my love. I'll take a shower and then we'll enjoy the night, alright?" Rebecca nodded. She went to the living room, grabbed her phone, and sent a message to Andre.
• "Darling, help me. I'm with Peter and I think it's going to happen. I'm nervous and scared. What should I do?" She received a response seconds later.
• "What does your heart say? Do you really want this? If so, don't be afraid. The first time is strange, but try to enjoy it. If you have doubts, don't do it and ask him to respect your moment." She thought for a few minutes.
• "Okay, I love you. See you tomorrow." She replied while struggling with her indecision.
• Determined, Rebecca returned to the bedroom, ready to seize the moment. When Peter came out of the bathroom shirtless, she stood still, observing his muscles and defined abs. He approached and kissed her deeply until both ran out of breath.
• "Rebecca, I love you, I miss you every day. I want to have you with me, feel every inch of your body." Peter said, lowering the strap of Rebecca's nightgown, leaving her only in lingerie. Rebecca blushed and he led her to the bed. "Relax, my dear. You'll enjoy it. I won't hurt you."
• Peter kissed her again, exploring every inch of her body. Rebecca's heart raced when he kissed her nipple over the bra. She let out a loud moan, which only excited him more. Peter removed the bra and continued kissing her breasts. As he got closer to her intimate area, he kissed her over the panties while watching her. Nervous, Rebecca interrupted him just as he was about to remove her panties.
• " Please, stop. I don't know if I want this," she says, getting up from the bed.
• " What? What's the problem? Just a minute ago, you seemed to be enjoying it!" Peter pulls her closer and lays her back on the bed, kissing her body. He tries to remove her underwear again, but Rebecca pushes him away and leaves for the living room. He punches the bed in frustration. "Rebecca, what's going on?" he asks, approaching her.
• " I said no, Peter. I don't want to. I'm not ready. And it feels like you're forcing me," she replies.
• " It's just sex, Rebecca. We're a couple. It's not the end of the world. Why are you making it so difficult?"
• " Just sex? That's not the memory I want for my first time," Rebecca returns to the bedroom and starts getting dressed. "Please, take me home. I don't want to sleep here tonight."
• " Are you kidding me? Are you a 12"year"old child? You're an adult. We've been dating for almost two years. Why can't we make love?"
• " Peter, I just don't want to. I don't feel comfortable. I'm tired from the trip. Take me home."
• " You're acting like the Virgin Mary. Rebecca, sex is normal. Why all this drama? Stop romanticizing it. If you want to leave, go. But go alone. You don't deserve my time." His reaction leaves Rebecca speechless. She grabs her things and leaves Peter's apartment.
• " It was past two in the morning when Nicolas and Alex finally arrived in Seattle. Both were accompanied by Ryan, who was a lawyer and one of Alex's best friends. After checking in, Alex and Ryan decided to have a drink at PUB Tricks, near the hotel.
• " "So, my friend, how are things between you and Sophia? I heard you're getting engaged in the next few months," Ryan asks.
• " "Don't believe rumors. I have no idea where they come up with these stories. Sophia is a good woman, but marriage is not in my plans. I don't desire it, and I believe she doesn't either. It seems like she's just following her parents' wishes, who want her to marry the only heir of the Shaw family."
• " "Alex, I don't understand you. She used to be the woman you loved. What happened?"
• " "Maybe it used to be like that. But now I know it's not what I want. I might still have feelings for her, but marriage doesn't make sense. It feels like our relationship has become a business agreement."
• " "Friend, I swear I would need ten lives to understand you. Being your friend is complicated, let alone being your wife, girlfriend, or lover," Alex laughs.
• " "I care about her, that's all. I want her to be well. She's beautiful and intelligent, but lately, she seems devoid of personality. Ever since she took over the family business, she's become a different person. She does everything they ask of her, no longer in control of her own life. And the constant pressure from my grandmother, wanting this marriage, annoys me. The family is the reason for my lack of interest in Sophia, and vice versa."
• " "I understand, but I don't know if she'll take this decision well."
• " "It's not my problem. I won't marry just because they want me to. I don't even know if I want to continue with her. But I don't want to talk about it now."
• " "I have something to tell you. I'm in love. I hope you support me; your opinion means a lot to me."
• " "In love with a certain redhead?" Alex asks, observing his friend's surprised reaction.
• " "Am I that predictable? How did you know?"
• " "I noticed the exchanged glances between you lately. Forget about it, Ryan. It was just a kiss in adolescence and nothing more. I don't feel anything for her, and I'm sure she doesn't feel anything for me either. I hope you two enjoy yourselves."
• " "Let's toast to that, my friend," Ryan smiles, raising his whiskey glass. "I'm deeply in love with Christine. I believe she's the woman of my life."
• " "Wow, I can only wish you happiness and good luck. She's my friend, but she's a bit annoying, conceited, and controlling," Alex jokes, making Ryan laugh.
• " "I can't disagree." They continue talking and drinking at the bar.
• Rebecca arrives home and goes straight to her room, without waking up her parents. She takes a shower in an attempt to relax; the hot water mixes with her tears as she reflects on the night she had. After drying off, she lies down on the bed and, grabbing her phone, calls Andre.
• "Why are you calling me at this hour? Shouldn't you be resting? How did it go for you?" Andre asked when he answered.
• "Andre, it didn't happen. I couldn't do it. I felt insecure. Peter got frustrated and even let me go home alone. I don't know what to do."
• "Rebecca, depending on the situation, I could also get frustrated. We're men, after all. Try to understand his frustration. You've been together for almost two years and you haven't reached that point yet. He really loves you, because if it were me, I would have given up a long time ago. You know I love you, but things need to be clear. We want that with our partners." Rebecca remained silent for a while.
• "Maybe it's just my fear of disappointing, of not being good enough."
• "It won't be like that, the first time is complicated for both. Overcome this and try if it's what you desire. Now rest and think about what you really want. I'll see you tomorrow afternoon. I love you."
• "I love you too. Thank you for listening to me. See you tomorrow!" She types several messages to Peter, but decides not to send them. Setting the phone aside, she turns off the bedside lamp and silently cries herself to sleep.