Chapter 246

• Kaleb knew he was a donkey and it wasn't a pleasant conviction. For a man used to giving orders and being in control like he was, being in limbo, or in a situation where he didn't have full maneuverability, was annoying. Actually, it was more than that, of course. It wasn't just the lack of control. He would have loved to continue with his life, lightly, without thinking anymore, leaving Casie and the earthquake she had unleashed in his previously orderly and regulated existence behind. Two weeks ago he had made the decision to completely separate himself from her, after days of doubts in which he felt too weak to detach himself. As if he were bewitched, imbued with a weakness that made him not want to stop talking to her or caressing her, or even just looking at her.
• Considering himself defenseless was what drove him to behave like a damn bastard. Casie deserved a different treatment, for him to explain to her in a civilized and personal way his doubts, his desire not to commit to anyone. But he was so cowardly that he didn't feel capable of confronting her and coming out unscathed. He tried to persuade himself that he was doing it for her, to avoid the bad moment or the tears, to not break her. However, deep down he knew that the weak one was him, that he was the one who was not up to the beautiful kitten.
• When these ideas haunted his mind (and it was common for them to do so most of the day), he defended his position by shouting at himself over and over again that he had promised her nothing. He had not committed to anything, he had made it clear that theirs was a casual relationship in which they shared fleeting desires and interests. They had been dominant and submissive for a while.