Chapter 3
- The moment Sarah had walked into the school, I was in love. At first, I was a bit dumbfounded. How could I be in love with a human? I knew she wasn’t a wolf. You could smell humans from miles away. She had this intriguing air about her.
- We were fifteen when we met and life seemed uncomplicated and adventurous. That first week, I followed her home every day. I wasn’t stalking her, maybe a little, but not the dangerous kind of stalking.
- I was fascinated by her and try as I might, I couldn’t get her out of my head. She came up to me one day during lunch and simply asked, “When are you going to ask me out?” That was how Sarah and I had started dating.
- Sarah wasn’t a one-time thing for me, it wasn’t cheap. What we shared was special. When I first met Sarah, I wasn’t a wolf, meaning, I hadn’t yet shifted into a wolf. I was purely human, a special human, but nonetheless still human and so was she.
- Before we turned sixteen, we would make out and hold hands. After my initial resurrection though, something else had woken up inside me. I felt everything more intensely, love, anger, lust, and hate.
- She felt it too when we reunited after those three months. There was a passion between us and even though I had planned to break up with her at that first meeting, instead we ended up going a little further than usual. I tried to create a place for Sarah in my life where our relationship would be acceptable. I failed miserably.
- At school we walked hand in hand to classes and it was obvious to everybody but us that we would date, even before we started dating. She was a cheerleader and even though I didn’t partake in sports, I was seen as a jock.
- It was only natural that we would gravitate toward each other and become a couple. It had been obvious to James as well, but he approved about as much as Malachi did. I couldn’t blame him though, he was my Beta, and a stickler for following the rules.
- In the cafeteria, the basketball and football team dragged five tables together and that was where we sat during lunch. The staff eventually just left the tables as they were and it became the table where we would sit every day of our high school careers. The cheerleaders joined us when Sarah and I started dating and after we broke up, they moved with Sarah to another table.
- We were both popular at school and I had plenty of friends, some of them that would say I was with them even when I wasn’t. It became easier and easier to lie and say I was with someone other than Sarah.
- I would drive Sarah home after school and most afternoons we were alone at her house. It would always end in a make out session of mutual exploration. I was her first serious boyfriend and she was my first serious girlfriend. I met her parents and they liked me. I had good manners and I was always respectful of them and of Sarah.
- The first and only time Sarah and I had sex, was an unforgettable afternoon as we stumbled our way to her bed, fumbled with each other’s clothes and didn’t even think of using protection. In the heat of the moment we both just didn’t think.
- We took our time and we kissed and touched. We weren’t shy and when she nodded her agreement as I hovered on top of her I was high on the intensity of our feelings for each other. Yeah, I was being a complete idiot, going against everything I believed in.
- “I love you,” she said to me on that fateful afternoon as we lay on her bed naked and I smiled. We had gone all the way. It was a special moment that we shared.
- “I love you too,” I said to her and we kissed again. It was true. I did love Sarah and I believed that she loved me too. That’s why I would be ashamed of my actions in the months leading up to and following her death forever.
- I usually showered when I got home before I had to meet Malachi at the den for training. That specific afternoon was different. Malachi was in the kitchen when I came home late. I had lied to him and said I was meeting Sam.
- It happened so fast and one moment I was looking at my father and the next moment I was fighting an Alpha wolf. He had smelled her scent on me, and carnage broke out. I was on the losing end of that fight and my father had lost his mind.
- Facing a fierce Alpha in wolf form is no joke and I had no choice but to try and defend myself. Malachi was much larger than I was and he came at me ferociously. As I shifted I found myself pinned down and bite after bite rained down on me.
- “Malachi!” Karani screamed at him.
- Just as quickly as Malachi attacked, he retreated, and left me to lick my wounds. That surprised me because his anger towards me had been intense. It had threatened to choke me as I breathed his emotions in.
- Karani hadn’t been pleased that her kitchen got ruined in the process of that fight. It was the first time I had seen Malachi as an aggressive Alpha wolf. To this day, it’s something that I can’t quite put together, the calm lawyer and the aggressive wolf that he could be when it was needed.
- My wounds would start to heal but Karani cleaned them anyway. She shook her head sadly and I could feel her sadness in myself and see it in her aura. That was probably the moment that the realization hit me. I had hurt my mother.
- Malachi had called me into his study. That was always where I got my lectures from him, but this time Karani followed me inside and went to stand at his side. That was definitely a first.
- “You can’t keep seeing her,” Malachi said very calmly.
- “She’s human and you might hurt her. That will cause problems for the entire pack.” He was right, of course, but how could I tell him that I loved her? How could I tell him that she was different from other humans?
- “I tolerated your relationship with her before you shifted. Now, it’s just unacceptable,” he said to me and I looked down. He had known the whole time.
- “Dad, I…” I couldn’t finish that sentence, the guilt was eating me up inside. The wolf guilt.
- “Kiran, we love you, you know that. We just want what’s best for you, best for everyone.” Karani was looking at me intently.
- “You’re a wolf, the next Alpha. This cannot happen again.” Karani had a way of getting her way and that was the end of that.
- Even now I can still remember the look in her eyes, the smile on her lips as our fingers intertwined and how she felt in my arms. I don’t think I’ll ever forget, I can’t forget, and I won’t let myself forget. It was my greatest shame, and the most damning mistake I ever made. Regret came too late for me.