Chapter 182

• Silently, he helps me pack my things back into my bag. We had held each other in silence, just entwined, until the pilot called to inform us the jet would be ready for take-off by the time we got to the airfield. Jake watches me steadily but leaves me alone with my thoughts; he knows I won’t talk about this anymore. My wall is up on the matter, and I’m already filing it into the back of my head with all the other crap I never want to face. I won’t bring it up again, much like I never bring Marissa up. Now that he finally understands how I tick inside, he knows me well enough to leave it alone.
• I feel like a complete failure. I’m numb from overthinking, from pushing it all back into the recess of my mind, back into that little black box with the rest of my heartache and terrors.
• Back with the child who used to cry herself to sleep in fear of her bedroom door creaking open in the darkness.