Chapter 6

• Cyrus
• As I sat in my apartment that night, the glow from the streetlights outside casting soft shadows across the room, my mind wouldn’t stop racing. I could still feel the warmth of Darius’s hand on mine, the gentleness in his voice when he spoke about little space. The idea of it, of letting go of everything and embracing something so pure, seemed strange but somehow... right.
• I sat on my couch, my laptop open in front of me. Darius’s words echoed in my mind, making me wonder if I had a side of me I’d been hiding. He’d said it was okay to explore it, that there was no pressure. The way he’d spoken so openly, so calmly about something so personal, made me feel less alone. Maybe I could give this little space a shot, see if it really was something that could help me feel more... at ease.
• I opened Google, fingers trembling slightly as I typed in “little space lifestyle.” The first few links were a mix of blogs and forums, and I clicked on the one that looked like it might answer my questions. It explained the lifestyle in more detail, reassuring me that it wasn’t about age or being immature—it was about finding a way to reconnect with a simpler, more carefree part of yourself.
• Then, I saw a link that caught my eye: “Find out your Little Age: Take the Test!” I hesitated for a moment, my heart beating a little faster, but curiosity won out. I clicked the link and found myself looking at a questionnaire.
• It wasn’t long before the questions began. They weren’t hard, but they made me pause as I considered each answer. “How do you feel when you let go of adult responsibilities?” “Do you enjoy being cared for and taken care of?” “What makes you feel comforted and safe?” The questions seemed strange at first, but as I answered them, I began to realize how often I had wished I could just... stop being responsible for everything. I had spent so much of my life being weighed down by obligations, by the pressure to always be strong, always be mature. Maybe this was what I had been craving all along—a chance to feel free from all of that.
• I answered the questions honestly, even though some of them felt vulnerable. As the final question loaded, I felt a strange anticipation in my chest. I clicked the submit button, and the results appeared on the screen.
• “Your Little Age: 0-4 years old.”
• I blinked, staring at the words as they sank in. 0-4 years old? That couldn’t be right. I had expected something a little older
• But... 0-4?, does that mean my mindset fluctuates, being so little as 0 years old feels so strange.
• I sat back, my mind spinning as I processed the results. I had never thought about myself in this way—never imagined I might have a side to me that was so... young. It was hard to wrap my head around it, but at the same time, it felt strangely comforting. A part of me felt validated, like I had discovered something about myself that I had always been too afraid to acknowledge.
• I glanced at the clock and realized it was already late. But the questions kept swirling in my mind—what did it mean to have a little age of 0-4? How would I explore this? I didn’t know yet, but I knew one thing for sure. Darius had given me the freedom to discover who I was without judgment, and that was something I hadn’t had in a long time.
• As I closed my laptop, I leaned back on the couch, feeling a mix of excitement and uncertainty. The road ahead was unclear, but for the first time in a while, I didn’t feel so alone. And maybe that was all I needed to start—just the freedom to be myself, whatever that looked like.
• The results from the test still echoed in my mind as I closed my eyes, drifting off to sleep. 0-4 years old. A part of me had just begun to understand who I truly was, and it felt like the beginning of something new, and different.
• I went to bed since it was almost 12am.
• When I woke up, I picked up my phone to see a message from Darius ;
• Good morning, darling. Hope you slept well. I will come and pick you up this morning, don't worry about breakfast, I will bring something over. See you in an hour.
• The message came in about ten minutes ago. I quickly leapt off my bed and went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and shower. Picking out a ripped jeans with a big sweater that covers my hand, I brushed my hair, not like I have any product to apply. Putting my laptop in my bag and phone in my pocket. I looked at the time, ten minutes till he gets here.
• My phone rang and I picked the call.
• "Good morning, baby. How was your night?" Darius asked. "It was great. And yours?". "My night was fine, I kept dreaming about this boy who I took to dinner last night." He replied and my cheeks turned a violent shade of red. "I'm downstairs, come on out."
• I picked my bag and rushed out of my apartment, making sure to lock the door. When I reached the bottom of the steps and saw him standing there, I couldn’t help but pause for a moment. There he was, leaning casually against his car, looking effortlessly stunning. His suit fit him perfectly, the fabric hugging his broad shoulders and tapering down his frame in a way that made him look like he had just stepped out of a magazine. The windbreaker added an element of casualness to the outfit, making it look like he wasn’t even trying, but still looking perfect all the same.
• I stood there for a moment, wondering how someone like him—someone so composed and put together—could possibly want someone like me. I wasn’t sure what I had to offer, not in the way he seemed to have everything figured out. But as I met his eyes and saw that smile spreading across his face, I couldn’t help but feel like he was truly glad to see me.
• “You look amazing, Cyrus,” Darius said as I approached, his voice warm and sincere. “I’m really glad you’re spending the day with me.”
• I felt my cheeks flush again, but this time, I welcomed it. He didn’t just look handsome—he was kind, thoughtful, and attentive. The way he spoke, the way he made me feel like I was important, even though I barely knew him... It was all so overwhelming, and yet, it felt like I was exactly where I was supposed to be.
• “Thank you,” I mumbled, my words coming out softer than usual. “You look... incredible, too.”
• He chuckled and opened the passenger door for me, his eyes holding a certain tenderness as I climbed inside. The interior of the car was just as immaculate as I’d expected—elegant and sleek, but with an air of warmth that made it feel inviting. He slid into the driver’s seat and started the engine, glancing over at me as he did.
• “So,” he began, his voice low and casual. “Have you given more thought to what we talked about last night?”
• I nodded, a small sigh escaping me as I thought back to the test I had taken and the results that had completely caught me off guard. "Yeah, I did. I didn’t expect the results, but... I think it makes sense. It’s strange, though. I’ve never really thought about my little age, or even what that means. I guess I’m just trying to figure it out."
• Darius glanced at me, his expression softening. "It's okay to take your time with it, Cyrus. You don’t need to rush or put pressure on yourself. Exploring that side of you—if you want to—is about comfort, not expectations. And if you ever want to talk about it, I’m here. No judgments."
• His words were a balm to my nerves, soothing a part of me I hadn’t realized was so tense. I wasn’t alone in this, not really. I had Darius, and that realization made the weight on my shoulders a little lighter.
• I smiled at him, feeling a sense of warmth spreading through me. "Thanks, Darius. I... I appreciate you being so understanding."
• He winked at me, his smile playful. "Of course. Now, let’s get you that breakfast I promised."
• As we drove, the city slowly waking up around us, I felt a sense of calm I hadn’t experienced in a long time. Whatever was coming next, whatever I was going to discover about myself, I knew one thing for sure: with Darius by my side, I wouldn’t have to face it alone. And that, more than anything, made me feel like everything was going to be okay.