Chapter 3

• The house hadn't changed. It was still as she remembered it, standing tall like nothing could shake it down. Even in the dark, Alexis knew she could walk around it perfectly without bumping or tripping on anything. She still remembered the first day Jim had moved them in. Her mother was so mad that she'd punched her dad for calling her a drama queen. Smiling, she stepped out of the car just as the front door opened and her mother rushed out. "Alexis" she cried out walking towards her. Having this overwhelming need to cry, she buried her face in the crook of her neck, trying to hold back her cries. She still smelled the same. Everything was still the same except for Jim. He wasn't there to welcome her home. "Oh baby it's okay. It's alright honey" Hayley said rubbing her back while looking at her husband worriedly.
• Not wanting to make a scene, Alexis pulled back wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "I missed you so much mom. Both of you" she added looking back at JR. He stepped forward winding his hand around her shoulders.
• "We missed you too honey" he said tucking Hayley in his other arm and together they walked inside. "Jayden, Gavin, Kieran get your lazy asses down here and greet your sister"
• "Jeez you'd think the queen of England has arrived with the way you're yelling dad" Jayden said strolling in from the kitchen. He looked at Alexis from head to toe and tsked. "You've lost weight sis. No food in London?"
• "There's plenty but nothing compares to mom's"
• "I agree with you on that." he smiled hugging her. She noticed he'd gotten bigger too, no longer the scrawny kid she left behind. Gavin and Kieran came bounding down the stairs clearly having made a bet on who would get to her first judging by how they kept pushing each other aside. Gavin obviously made it first since according to him he was older and his legs were longer. Nine year old Kieran waited until Gavin was done greeting their big sister before he moved in. Being the youngest, he was still sweet and innocent asking if Alexis had brought them presents. They had gone to the hotel she'd booked to retrieve her luggage before coming back home. Zach was currently taking her bags upstairs.
• "I wouldn't forget to buy you a gift Kieran. I promised you I'd bring you something and I did. I would never break my promises"
• He turned to Gavin sticking his tongue out "I told you she wouldn't forget"
• "Idiot. Grow up, gifts are for kids"
• "I'm not a kid just because I want a gift. Right mom"
• "Yes Kieran. Let your brother be if he doesn't want his" Hayley told them. Gavin's eyes widened and he protested
• "I didn't say I don't want it"
• "Liar. You just said......"
• JR cut them off "Alright go argue somewhere else. Your sister just got back and she needs rest."
• "I'm fine dad. Really"
• "No you're not. Jayden was right. You've lost weight and there are dark circles under your eyes honey. Go on up to your room and have proper rest" he said nudging towards the stairs. Alexis nodded thankful to be alone. Being back home knowing Jim wasn't around made her sad. It seemed only like yesterday that he was sneaking out with her to take her out because Jayden wouldn't stop crying. They'd done that a lot. Ran to avoid baby sitting duties. He'd told her she would always be his favorite even after her brothers had been born. Why did he have to die? All of a sudden memories of him laughing, stealing cookies for her, telling her to ask for diamonds for her birthday came crushing in one her, and she ran to her room locking herself in. Settling on her bed, Alexis rested her forehead on her knees crying. She didn't know if she could live in that house and not be haunted by his memories.
• She missed him so much it hurt. He was the only grandfather she'd known, her maternal one having died before she was born. How was she going to live knowing he wasn't around anymore? After two years it had to be easy. They said that pain lessened with time but hers seemed to amplify. Jim had been her best friend. Her biggest supporter. When her parents were busy taking care of her brothers and she felt neglected, Jim was always there reminding her she was the Princess. He'd told her countless times that no one was going to replace her. He'd promised her that she was always going to be the only Rutherford Princess even if her parents had another daughter. She had come to rely on him so much that without him now she felt lost. She cried harder knowing she would never see him again. Being in London had felt like a trip. Somehow she'd fooled herself into believing that when she came back, he would still be there. She had hoped that him being gone was just a nightmare. It only dawned on her just then that he was gone forever. There was no way he was coming back.
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• Hayley stood outside Alexis room listening to her cries. She hated knowing that her daughter was suffering. She'd known without a doubt that going abroad to study was just an excuse and that Alexis was running. Hearing her cry made her regret not stopping her two years ago. She hadn't grieved for her grandfather and two years was a long time to keep it all in. She'd probably avoided it until then which was why she was crying so hard. Her hand was ready to knock but she stopped midair. Alexis needed to let it all out or the pain would only fester itself until it turned into something else. Something ugly. Retreating she walked back to her bedroom where her husband was coming out of the shower clad in only a towel.
• Fifteen years later and she hadn't stopped wanting him. He still filled her stomach with butterflies with just one look. "Hey what's wrong" he asked scrunching up his eyebrows.
• "I'm scared for Alexis" she said worrying her bottom lip.
• "Why? She just got back. She's fine and I told Nick to hide that damn motorcycle she just bought."
• "No it's not that. I just went to ask if she needed something and I heard her crying through the door. I'm afraid that she hasn't grieved for Jim properly"
• "Honey, it's been two years..."
• "And she's been away JR. She left when she should have stayed and come to terms with the fact that Jim was gone. I shouldn't have let her leave"
• JR walked to where she had sat on the edge of the bed and settled beside her. "She's here now and we'll help her through it. Stop worrying"
• "I can't. You know how she gets JR. She piles up everything inside her until it's too much then when she can't take it anymore, she explodes."
• "Then let's talk to her"
• "We can't. She'll just convince us she's fine. I don't know what to do JR"
• "Don't worry. She'll come to us when she's ready. Just give her time my love" he kissed her forehead lifting her onto his lap. Hayley wound her arms around his neck, breathing in his aftershave, soap and musky scent. Knowing he was there with her every step of the way, made her worries lessen. He was her partner in every way, supporting her and lending her his strength when she needed it.
• "James......" she said in warning tone when she felt him digging into her thigh.
• "I can't help it. One touch is all I need" he placed his lips on her throat and she craned her neck to allow him more access. She'd thought time would dim the desire they felt for each other but it only seemed to do the opposite. His mouth travelled from her throat to her jaw then chin, stopping when his lips were on top of hers. Just as he was about to kiss her, they heard a thump and froze. "They're fighting again. Aren't they?"
• "Yap." Hayley replied sighing.
• "I'll go throw them out then we can continue this in peace" JR growled attempting to stand up but she stopped him placing her hands on his chest.
• "You're not going anywhere like that." she got up her eyes travelling down to where his erection was straining against the towel. "You stay right there and I'll be back" Hayley walked to the door schooling her face to look like she was mad. Gavin and Kieran never stopped fighting and sometimes she let them be. But today she needed them to settle down so her husband could make love to her in peace. And she had just the right thing to threaten them with.
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