Chapter 2 Pain

• /-RILEY-/
• I wake up feeling incredibly sore. Tears built up in my eyes as I realized it wasn't a dream. I just lost my virginity to a man I know almost nothing about.
• I sob on the bed, unable to move. What do I tell mom? How do I face dad? What will I tell them? I snuck to a party and got raped? My phone rings on the bed and I reach for it immediately.
• “Where the fuck are you, Riley? I know I said fuck... ...”
• “I was raped, Diane,” I blurt out. She remains quiet for a while before bursting into a laugh. A cruel laugh.
• “Okay, you got me there.....”
• “I'm not kidding. You abandoned me. You made me come and you left me. You left me, Diane. Alone in a dangerous club and I got raped” I yell over the phone with tears streaming down my cheeks.
• I throw away the phone and sob. I feel so worthless. Will I ever be able to get over this? Can I live with this scar?
• I roll off the bed and crawl to the bathroom. I run a steamy bath and soak myself in. The memories keep flashing in my head, and I shut my eyes trying to forget, but the pain in my vagina reminds me constantly of every single moment.
• I cry myself to sleep in the bath. I feel a lot better after waking and step carefully out of the bath. I take careful steps to the room, and the bloody sheets remind me once again of what I tried to forget.
• Unable to cry anymore, I wrap the bathrobe round my body and step out of the room. I borrow clothes from one of the workers and cash too. I hailed a cab and got home to meet mom looking so mad. I fake a smile and walk over to her.
• “Where were you last night?” She asks angrily. I open my mouth to talk, but nothing comes out. I've never thought of lying to mom ever.
• “I'm sorry mom” I apologize. She slaps me and I blink rapidly.
• “You know I never thought I could raise a whore as a daughter” She yells, and my eyes snap to her. Did my mom just call me a whore?
• “I gave you everything you asked for. I sent you to the best high school in San Francisco. I was ready to...... God! What on earth do those scumbags give you?” She yells.
• “What are you talking about, mom?” I sob. She raises her hands to hit me again, but Diane stops her.
• “Stop hitting her, Sarah. It won't change anything. The most important thing is you know the real Riley. I tried telling you and Dad severally but as usual, no one listens to Diane. They say Diane is the bad one. Maybe I'm bad, but at least I don't go sleeping around” She says and shock takes over.
• “Diane you….”
• “I would rather not hear it. I told you not to go, didn't I? You said no one would find out” She snaps at me. Tears roll uncontrollably down my cheeks.
• I should have known there was no way she would just decide to go out with me. I should have known she would never waste so much dolling me up.
• Mom casts me a disappointed look and walks in. Diane turns to me.
• “How's that for a bummer, little whore?” She smirks.
• “You planned this? Why would you do this to me? I'm your sister.....”
• “You're Sarah's daughter, Riley. What did you think? That you could just walk into my life with your mom and take my dad from me? It ain't happening," She says with a hate filled voice and walks in.
• My head spins. I never thought Diane could hate me so much. I know she doesn't like me, but did she have to ruin me this way? Mom won't even hear me out. I walk to my room and shut the door.
• I sit on the bed thinking of how quickly my world is crumbling. I don't even have the strength to cry anymore. My head hurts as well.
• I open the drawer and search for aspirin, but the screeching of the car stops me. I wave it off and reach for the bottle, but Dad's thunderous voice stops me again. Did Diane lie to him too?.
• “I want that dirty little whore out of my house this minute” He thunders.