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Chapter 10

  • My mother informed me that my stepfather is on a business trip and will then come to visit her from Portland. Maybe I'll see him someday, but I don't care if I never see him, as long as he lets me live here.
  • I woke up early in the morning, which is rare for me, considering I prefer sleeping to eating, and that's saying a lot. I decided to make the most of the day, take a shower, change, and take a walk around the neighborhood. The weather was perfect, and I loved that the sun rays hadn't reached the sidewalks yet; it was too early for that. Besides, the trees there were gigantic, just like the houses.
  • My house was modest, a regular home for three people, while there, houses could fit twenty people and live peacefully without having to see each other's faces all day long. You wouldn't find a single piece of trash on those streets; everything was perfectly clean, like a beautiful adornment to planet Earth.
  • Thinking about the clear differences between Portland and London made me miss my home even more. Although I wanted to get away from my mother, I didn't want to leave John. I didn't want to leave Martin either. And I hadn't spoken to Millie since I arrived. It surprised me that she hadn't called me even once, when before, we couldn't go five hours without knowing about each other.
  • Putting those thoughts aside, I tied my hair into a ponytail and dared to sit on the grass. Everything felt strange to me; I had mixed feelings about all these drastic changes in my life. I felt weak, as if a simple jolt could bring me down, and it intensified after what happened the day before. I didn't think it was right to let Nick provoke me the way he did. Until the day before, I had kept my distance, not allowing him to touch me the way he wanted. At first, I was in complete denial; I thought I was being paranoid, but after what happened in his room, I wasn't so sure.
  • Compared to what happened in the bathroom, there was a vast difference. I was conscious and coherent enough to push him away, but this time... I wasn't. I didn't react the same way when he got close the first time as I did the second time. I got goosebumps just feeling his proximity, and I wanted to know how far those sensations went, and I did, they went very high. That scared me.
  • I considered all the possibilities. Family connection, but I dismissed it immediately, wanting to hit myself in the head for even thinking it. Then, raging hormones, common at my age, but I knew it couldn't be that; Martin wouldn't even provoke that kind of reaction by kissing me. Many other things crossed my mind, but none fit.
  • I found the solution to this problem on my way back home. Don't let him get so close again. If he does, I'll expose how uncomfortable he makes me feel, and he'll leave me alone.
  • That was it.
  • I had to do it.
  • He was my stepbrother; he needed to know the difference between me and any other girl he had... sexual relationships with.
  • He controlled everything in my life until now. He wouldn't change that.
  • When I stopped on the sidewalk in front of the house, I headed for the door, and just before opening it, someone did it for me.
  • It was Nick with another girl. She was scantily dressed, and her brown hair was messy, he was shirtless, and only wearing loose pants hanging from his waist. Does he have fun like this every night?
  • I smiled at both, trying to ignore the strange acidity in my stomach. "Hi, how are you? I'm Samantha, Nick's sister, and you are...?"
  • She smiled nervously. "I'm Sandra, Nick's friend."
  • "Great, I'm going to have some tea, would you like some?" I offered, trying to sound polite. Nick didn't find it amusing at all.
  • "No, it's okay. I have to go, but thank you very much," she apologized, feeling a bit embarrassed, and quickly passed by my side to leave. Nick didn't even offer to drive her; he was such a jerk.
  • I walked past him, trying not to touch his upper body. "Do you want tea?"
  • I felt like the door closed with the force of a thousand gods together as I walked to the kitchen.
  • "What's the matter with you?" I yelled, having a heart attack.
  • "Do you think you can invite anyone?" he roared, shaking his gigantic arms to express his indignation. It was funny. I rolled my eyes and started preparing my breakfast.
  • "You invited her first. I wanted to be polite."
  • My lack of interest irritated him even more.
  • "Because it's my damn house! I can invite whoever the hell I want!"
  • She was right; I couldn't deny it, but I needed to say something to that girl, or I would have felt bad. She probably would have felt terrible realizing that Nick would ditch her just like that.
  • I didn't say anything; I ignored him as I took two cups from the cupboard. Once the water was ready, I poured it along with the tea bags into the cups. I handed one to Nick, and he just looked at me with a frown. He had the same tense posture. He didn't move an inch.
  • I placed the cup on the kitchen table, waiting for him to sit with me.
  • "You're right, but I felt bad," I confessed as I handed him the cup. "Sit down; you'll get a cramp if you keep tensing up like that."
  • Distrustful, Nick sat down with me. He still seemed angry, almost like a little child who had been scolded. "Wipe that look off your face," I apologized.
  • As I reached for some cookies I saw on the counter, Nick finally spoke. "Why did you wake up so early?"
  • "I... I don't know. I assure you I love sleeping, but today, when I opened my eyes, I couldn't close them again." I placed the cookies in the middle of the table, hoping he'd take one. I had a little knowledge about the neighborhood, but everything was exactly the same; all the houses were gigantic and extravagant, and there wasn't even a park nearby.
  • Nick nodded in agreement with me. "That's why I left here."
  • "Your aunt told me you had problems in your flat, and that's why you're staying here for a while. When will they fix it?" I wanted to know, thinking that if he left, I wouldn't be afraid that he'd touch me and drive me crazy.
  • "Why?"
  • "It's just a question."
  • "Do you want me to leave, Sam?" I could see him lifting the corner of his lip. He wasn't angry anymore, but was that mischievousness? I couldn't define his expression.
  • "Yes."
  • "What? No, it's your house; if you want to be here, you have to be here."
  • "Believe me, that's not what I want." He took a sip of his tea, and I knew. He said it because of me. So the feeling of being far away from each other was mutual.
  • "Listen, about Saturday..."
  • "Don't you want to go?"
  • "No, it's not that; it's just that I think I'd rather stay home, you know."
  • He smiled, and I swear I almost fainted. His smile still had an effect on me; he was so cute.
  • He raised an eyebrow and licked his lip; he was studying me, slowly, and during that whole moment, I didn't breathe. When he placed his hand over mine, it was all over. "Oh, come on, Sam, we'll have fun."
  • I knew he was teasing; did he know what he was doing, was he aware of my nerves around him? I didn't think he could be such a jerk.