Chapter 62 Knox

• I hated seeing Jake like this. This was not the Jake we know and love. He had withdrawn into himself and it was horrible. The fact he said Jaxx had gone silent on him again concerned me too. Jaxx surprised me attacking to the point of death with Rose. I thought he may attack to injure, to bring her down, never to maim or kill. Not to his mate. He had wanted his mate, or I had thought he had.
• Though part of me is wondering if the Beta wolf in him shone through and he was protecting his pack members. That is what I would do as Alpha. That is what you have to do. Protect your pack members. And that is what he did, he was protecting Ruby. He had done the right thing. I will always believe that. Though I know with Ruby there are feelings there. Maybe even love if he looked deeper. They had been getting closer, I had noticed it, and so had Lilah. We were forever trying to push them together, knowing they would make a perfect couple. And with them being the only single ones in the group, they ended up together when we were hanging out. Not that they complained, they seemed to enjoy one another's company. And of late I had found out they were spending time together on an evening too, though we never mentioned it, as it appeared they hadn't wanted any of us to know. So, with all that in mind, would it really be that much of a surprise if feelings were now involved? If love had even developed? Because I truly don't think it would be. But that was likely the least of his worries at the moment. And it wasn't something I was going to mention right now, it was not something that needed bringing up. Jake needed my support as a friend. As his Alpha too. Though I truly do not know what to do to help him. And that hurts me. Breaks me. I hate to see my friend like this.
• I know there is a chance he attacked to protect Ruby because of those feelings he potentially had. Or in his mind he is questioning if that is why he attacked her, and without Jaxx there to confirm why he did what he did, he can't know. And I think that is the guilt he is fighting with at the moment. Thinking that he attacked Rose to protect Ruby because he had feelings for her, feelings for someone that was not his fated mate. And he is struggling so much with that guilt he doesn't know what to do. And without Jaxx there to help him process it all, or go over why he did what he did, he couldn't begin to come to terms with it. I need Jaxx to get his head out of his own ass and come to help Jake, the way he should be doing. A wolf should not be abandoning his human in a moment like this. It could not happen at a worse time. I was angry at Jaxx right now.