Chapter 9 Current Goals

• “Damn you!” I yelled in disgust and threw the brown fake penis toy back at Renesmee's face. “Please, can't your brain not think of blue movies for a day?”
• “I can't!” they both said in unison.
• “You've been single for too long; so dry is your pussy that your brain keeps thinking dirty thoughts.” I retorted irritably.
• Eloise struck a sexy pose while showing her bra-clad chest. “I'm single by choice!”
• She dumped her last boyfriend for being lazy. A toxic relationship that Eloise realized too late. Actually, they are both attractive and have a lot in common. But Eloise is the type of provider who finds happiness when she can fulfill the needs of others. Meanwhile, her ex-boyfriend was a lazy man who had no desire to move forward. Win-win solution. However, after a while, Eloise got fed up and kicked her boyfriend out of her life.
• Renesmee and I partied all night to celebrate Eloise's independence from her useless ex. This meant that I no longer had to see that useless man living in our house. From that moment on, Eloise vowed not to date for an indefinite period.
• “There are risks. You used to date Jason, who was single, and there was so much drama. How much more with a big boss?” Renesmee wisely gave a very reasonable argument.
• “Wait… wait. I think Renesmee's mind is too far gone. Why are we even talking about dating? Does Serena like Leopold in the sense that she has feelings of chemistry with him?” Eloise shook her head quickly as she put the can of soda on the table.
• Renesmee and I looked at each other for a moment, and we knew what we were thinking. Eloise had a point.
• Why did the discussion go so far off track?
• Leopold and I don't know each other. We're just former sex partners from one night. And now our relationship is as professional as that of an employee to the CEO.
• I hurriedly shook my head. “Impossible! I have no interest in him. You know how I am.”
• I'm the kind of woman who takes a long time to fall in love. That's why I fall too deeply in love with every courtship.
• Eloise snapped her fingers, as if she had just gotten a brilliant idea.
• “I know your problem. You've been overthinking everything. That's why your dating relationships always fail. Your expectations are always high. You always give 200% of yourself in every relationship; there is no love left to love yourself. Now it's time for you to take a step back and enjoy your life,” Eloise said.
• I stared at her with a gawking face, because I didn't understand Eloise's monologue.
• “Serena, it's time for you to understand the concept of dating. Dating, as in just dating. No expectations. No future. Just two people fooling around.” Eloise looked at me with a big smile on her face.
• I shook my head. The idea sounded so absurd. So not me.
• “Listen to her advice,” said Renesmee, who had been silent.
• “Renesmee, your thinking is the most normal here. Don't go crazy like Eloise.” I protested, but Renesmee didn't care.
• Eloise cupped my face so that I couldn't move but look at her.
• “When you were in Monaco, you were no longer the old Serena Voss.” Eloise said quickly. She beat me to the punch when I was about to speak. “The old Serena wouldn't go back to Leopold's hotel room and have the best sex of her life.”
• I regretted telling her that it was the best sex of my entire life.
• “The meaning of Eloise's statement is that you can take a break from dating relationships for a while. Quitting your old company was a huge step because you finally listened to what you wanted. Jason was just a trigger in your brain, but we both know that you're not comfortable working in that office. Remembering that your father was the one who brought you to work at your former workplace.” Renesmee added.
• She's right.
• I'm the second of three children. My father, who was an air force general, brought us up strict and hard. Since childhood, my father has shaped my older brother to follow his career in the military.
• I don't know if my older brother liked his career, because he was really a photocopy of my father. His cold and stern face with no expression made it difficult for me to get close to him. Plus, my older brother acted physically rather than making sounds. That's what my father wanted. He wanted to create a child according to his wishes.
• My father wanted me to be the wife of a soldier. He already had a match for me, his subordinate, in the office. I don't like his choice of men.
• I never liked any of his choices. But I couldn't argue. The choice of school, friends, job, everything was dad's choice. For a mate, I dared to refuse, which led to a senseless war with him.
• The relationship softened a bit when I went out with Jason. Although Jason had a career in a big company, his family had people who had positions in the military. My father softened a bit because at least he could still have a chance to have a son-in-law from a military family.
• When I broke up with Jason, my father considered me a failure. Plus, when I quit my old office, my failure in his eyes grew even more.
• “Whose soul mate is it? It's all in the future, which is still a mystery. But the present is in our control. Live a little. Your life is much bigger than Mr. General's palm.” Renesmee smiled slightly, putting me at ease.
• Although in my father's eyes, Eloise and Renesmee were living proof of my failure to choose friends. But, in reality, they were the best choices in my life.
• “There are many reasons why Leopold is suitable for the Live a Little More by Serena mission.” Eloise bent her fingers one by one as she mentioned the reasons. “One, he's super handsome, rich, and sexy. It's proven that he can give you the most explosive orgasm.”
• The Monaco incident was certainly not lost on the chatty Eloise.
• “Second…” She flexed her fingers again. “He's also got baggage, so I'm willing to bet he's not in the market for a new partner. So he's perfect for this mission.”
• “And third?” One of my eyebrows rose as Eloise's face turned super serious.
• Eloise smiled. “That Lord General, aka your father, would roar like a lion if he knew it related you to Leopold.”
• My laughter spilled out when I heard the third reason. Eloise was right. Leopold would never be on my father's list of acceptable men.
• Leopold was a civilian, unless he had a military family member. Based on the additional facts I learned, Leopold is much older than me. He was almost the same age as Uncle Frederick, my father's youngest brother. My age gap with Leopold was approximately 14 years.
• I didn't know Leopold's background. His slightly dark tan skin led me to believe he had a mix of non-European blood. Meanwhile, my father still held the principle that only people of European blood should flow into my future descendants.
• What an old-fashioned and conservative idea!
• Deep down in my heart, I don't care at all about race, color, culture, and so on. We are both human beings on earth, have unique beauty, and of course, for me, kindness is number one.
• “You're right.” I agreed with Eloise's words, which were right on target.
• All night, I thought about that conversation and realized that I had never enjoyed life. Maybe it's time to live life on my own terms. Not following what my father says.
• I went to bed tonight on one mission. To make Leopold mine. Not a boyfriend, let alone someone I'd consider being with eventually.
• Just someone temporary in my life. I need someone who can go with me as I enjoy life.
• Also, to get an explosive orgasm.