Chapter 3 Farewell James

• (TYRON)
• I fooled myself for so long that father will still regain consciousness. He’s been ‘dead’ the moment he was declared brain dead. There was no in-between. I have only spoken to him for few hours in a year and could only recall our few moments together. How abrupt all of it happened was just unacceptable. I suddenly remembered his words that day. How everything would be so hard when he’s gone. And I was already going through so much hardship.
• Dad had lost so much weight in the hospital. Bones jutted there and there; he was barely recognizable. I felt a little shame that I still haven’t found the girl I could spend the rest of my life with and introduce him to before he goes for the grave. I might not be able to keep the promise we made. But someday, who knows, there might just be a girl that would suit perfectly well with what my parents wished for me.
• I held my father’s hand and bid the last words I have thought of. It might just be the right time to finally let go. “Tell mom my greetings. I love and thank you both,” I whispered. Patients in comatose still could hear.
• The crumpled document that Eriez gave me earlier stared from the trash bin like a nightmare. My hands still trembled as I gathered enough courage to take it.
• “Rest in peace dad,” I leaned in closer to him before finally signing the paper.
• (ERIEZ)
• The door to the hospital room creaked open. Wenziel and I both stared at the folder Tyron was holding when he approached us. His eyes went from me to the other doctor with us. Although he went back to hiding his emotions, there was still sadness in his eyes.
• “Do whatever you want,” Tyron murmured as he handed me the folder.
• The faint beeping of the machine from inside the room sounded like a requiem already. As we expected, Tyron didn’t want to be there at James’ passing. He went down the corridor and never looked back at us even once.
• I couldn’t help but look at the white walls and be reminded of James and Tyron. Like those walls, both had seen deaths more than anyone was allowed to before their hearts break from pain.
• “That kid had been through so much,” Wenziel said to no one specifically.
• I agreed and opened the file at my hands. His neat signature caught my sight first. Then the dried tears that blotted the ink on the paper.
• “Do it,” I said.
• The doctor nodded at my words. Several people went in with him. Wenziel did too but I chose to be left outside the room. Before the doors closed, I caught a fleeting glimpse of James and got lost at the sight of white walls again; a thing that has gotten too familiar to me in my entire life as a doctor. Then I went back to gazing at the ticking hand of my wrist watch.
• “Time of death…” I heard the muffled announcement from inside and decided to walk down the corridor after Tyron.
• “Farewell James,” I said in the sterile hospital air.
• (TYRON)
• The glittering flashes of camera looked like stars on land that late afternoon. People stared from the lobby and some more crowd looked when I exited the hospital. Reporters littered around and swarmed to me to possibly get my statement.
• My mouth felt too sore to even talk and all the flashing lights around invaded the privacy I wanted for myself after my father had just died. My men formed me a barricade and it was only at those times that I was able to appreciate their presence.
• The visit wasn’t held a secret to the people. My life was too newsworthy for social media to ditch. They were actively on the watch for something big to happen. They’re constantly waiting to reveal a flaw that could taint my family’s reputation. After father fell on a coma, their secret lenses followed me wherever I go. I was also vulnerable to death. Security was heavy throughout the vicinity in case an attack was attempted against me. Amid all their clamors and questions, all I wanted was some peaceful place to go.
• Deo, my secretary, squeezed in through the crowd to escort me back to the hospital. I’ve been careless enough to have went right through the main exit. He led me and the rest of our guards to the hospital’s backdoors.
• “Your keys,” I ordered.
• Deo handed them to me without questions. He knew too well that people are familiar with all my cars and I didn’t want any mass attention that moment.
• My valet opened the car door but I stopped him and insisted I would drive instead. He tried to express concern but nobody could ever stop me from doing what I wanted. I needed to be alone.
• “Nobody is coming with me! Make the media believe I was still stuck in the hospital if that’s the least all of you could do for me.”
• My voice was actually shaking but I tried to hide it. I can no longer hold back the tears I kept from welling up in front of the crowd.
• I should not be seen in my weakness. Not by the people who saw me as their prey or by the people who knew me as their faultless boss.
• I turned on the engine and went off at full speed until I was out of sight. My heart was so heavy, and I really didn’t care where those wheels would take me. Anywhere quiet would do. All I wanted was some respite, maybe just for a few moments, from my otherwise troubled life.
• I hadn’t wished for all of this. I didn’t wish to be a Zel Cantheliz.
• (JANINE)
• That old chapel has been my regular go-to place after my shift as a cashier at a small fast food chain. I do so to say some prayers, visit sister Ema, and offer some flowers by the altar.
• There was this old lady who sells wreaths, bouquets, and single roses by a wooden pushcart on the way to the chapel. She’d usually be prepared to close for the day at the time I passed by. But after I became her regular customer, she patiently waited for me before going. And that day, she gave me three white roses for free.
• I insisted to pay but she refused. I just smiled in thanks and headed to where I was going to. Before I could reach the chapel, a car swerved in the distance and halted like it was in trouble. It looked expensive compared to the regular cars that park there during the day. After all, we’re on a small town beside the city and its residents were mostly low compensated white-collar workers who often commute or travel by foot.
• The car’s front window retracted down to reveal a man. His head was leaning dejectedly on the steering wheel and I could guess he’s either drunk, dumped, or just the way I was like before I first set foot on that old place. I suddenly remembered my past.
• I was so helpless and hopeless that all I did was cry at my misfortunes. And the heavens cried with me. All my burdens made my knees so weak that I couldn’t walk farther away and just fell by the cemented sidewalk like a mad woman.
• I lived with my paralytic father, my three siblings, and my stepmother with her own daughter, Nadine. Nadine was the eldest with a child of her own, Lilibeth. She took refuge, with her kid, back to her mother’s care when her husband left her and apparently added to the growing responsibilities of my father before he had been paralyzed.
• My biological older brother, Dexter, was a jobless freeloader and rumors has it that he was a rugby gangster. Amy, my half-sister, has befriended the wrong people who let her abandon her studies. She was usually out until late night and sometimes did not go home at all.
• Among them, only my father worked and provided for us. He was a foreman at a construction agency until a freak accident with a construction debris held him paralyzed for life. The company he was working for has paid his hospital bills and gave an ample amount which was practically not enough compared to the damage his job has caused him. Eventually, the money ran out and I was forced to abandon my studies.
• So, there I was, soaking wet in the rain until I felt numb and freezing.
• When I opened my eyes, a smiling nun greeted me. Just then did I realize I was in front of the old town chapel. She was holding an umbrella that couldn’t occupy two people so half of her dress has been wet too. I suddenly felt ashamed she has gotten soaked for trying to help me.
• “What you’re doing right now…” she sounded like an angel “isn’t helping you solve whatever your problem is. Let’s talk about it inside.”
• That’s how I met sister Ema, the most optimistic person I knew. She has helped me a lot and her advices made me stronger no matter what problems my family encountered.
• Seeing that man might be just the right time to pay the kindness forward, I thought.
• I smiled at the idea of helping another person who needed somebody else to talk to. The night was quiet and my heart felt perfectly cheerful as I approached the car. I was about to speak when my feet slipped on the small pebbles and I fell on the ground, butt first.
• “Ouch.” How clumsy…
• @SenaMangampo