Chapter 217

• I drove to a nearby park, and left the car in the parking lot. I walked to a park bench, and sat for a while. Looking at the water, very gentle waves moving across the water, the wind just barely making its presence known. This was one of those times, when I would really enjoy just spending eternity in a single moment. It had happened before, but right now, I just wanted to enjoy this peace. I closed my eyes. I slowly inhaled through my nose, and the scent of nearby lilacs and honeysuckle was enchanting.
• I kept my eyes closed. I felt my future slipping from my grasp, and for the first time in a long time, I didn't know what the future held. Maybe that was what was bothering me more than anything else. For the longest time, I had a plan, and a dream that I was living. I KNEW. I just KNEW the path forward, and it included Caitlin and me growing old together.
• Along those lines, I started to wonder. Could I forgive her? Could I get over the instant betrayal that she had gone along with? Could I forgive her enough to move on and live with her like we had before? I really wanted to. I did. The problem was that she had a chance to make this all go away, before it had even started. When my lying ass partner, decided that he wanted to play god, she could have confronted me. She could have shown me the RESPECT, the decency, to at least accuse me of cheating, before just letting that asshole put his cock in her.