Chapter 19 — Revelations

• The war had left a loss of words from Lily's mouth, all she felt was pain and pain and so much pain, it reeked and it destroyed all her emotions of happiness.
• As she held Mbazi's head in her hands, trying to cradle his already lifeless body, she started to rock herself, wanting to tear the last shred of humanity left in her, she wanted to rip them apart and this anger that she felt was dignified. The war had ended and she had led. Mbazi would have been so proud to know that she had been a good leader, when they spoke about her... Calling her a bad leader of all time, when they doubted her and how she could have been the wrong child from the river, how their words had hurt and sliced her, she never for once thought a war to be so cruel and demeaning.
• She was still on her knees when baba mbari ordered her soldiers to take mbazi's body away from her, she couldn't believe it, he was really gone. It flashed before her eyes, all the times they had laughed at each other's jokes, all the times they had trained together, the way they each seemed to wash their faces and how he always spoke about her scar and how it made her beautiful and to stand out. It wasn't fair that he had to die, it didn't even make any sense at all. She found everything about his death wrong, she didn't see anything justified about it. They had won the war but she needed to win this battle as well.