Chapter 2 What Do You Mean?

• Jake’s [POV]
• There was a split second of silence from the other line.
• “Mr. Middleton, I spoke to you about this last Friday,” she said.
• “I told you that I would need to leave early today. I told you I would need to leave by seven at the latest.”
• “Fuck,” I said before I could stop myself.
• “Excuse”
• “I’m sorry,” I said quickly.
• “I’m just… I completely forgot. I thought you said tomorrow night.”
• “I didn’t,” she replied crisply.
• “I have a doctor’s appointment to get to, Mr. Middleton.”
• “Right,” I said.
• “You said your father is going through something.”
• “Cancer,” Janet said tersely.
• “He’s going through cancer.”
• “Of course, I’m sorry,” I said quickly.
• “The thing is… I can’t get away today. I have two important meetings that start in five minutes, and that must be there.”
• “Mr. Middleton”
• “I’ll double your pay for today,” I said, cutting her off before she could tell me off.
• “Mr. Middleton”
• “I’ll triple it,” I said. There was another second of silence, and then I heard a loud sigh.
• “I suppose I will have to call my sister and ask her to go with my father for chemotherapy.”
• “Thank you, Janet,” I said, sighing in relief.
• “I can’t thank you enough.”
• “I gave you a week’s notice about this, Mr. Middleton,” she said, and I knew she was upset.
• “I expected you here by six.”
• “I know,” I said, trying to control my sense of irritation.
• “And, I understand you have an emergency. But when I hired you, I made it very clear that I would need you on call twenty-four-seven. You promised me that you would make yourself available to me whenever I required your services.”
• “That was before my father was diagnosed,” Janet replied curtly.
• “Again, I understand. It’s just... I pay you extremely well, Janet,” I said.
• “I’m paying you to double what full-time au-pairs are being paid in France’s richest homes. And, I made it very clear what I expected of you when I hired you.”
• “I suppose we’ll have to come to some sort of understanding in the future,” Janet replied.
• “Or I will have to move on.” There was nothing veiled about that threat. I gritted my teeth and forced myself not to reply.
• Her father was going through cancer; she was going through a hard time, and I didn’t want to seem like a complete asshole.
• I was pretty sure I had crossed the asshole line a few sentences ago, however.
• “We’ll discuss it later… When I’m home,” I said.
• “Alright.” I sensed the suppressed anger in her tone.
• “Is Noah around?” I asked.
• “Hold on,” Janet said. I heard a few seconds of static as the phone was passed over and then I heard a clear, high-pitched voice that made me feel sad and happy all at the same time.
• “Daddy?”
• “Hi, buddy,” I said, hating that I wasn’t there to see his face.
• I imagined him sitting on the stool by the phone in his dinosaur jammies, holding the phone with both hands, as he had grown accustomed to doing.
• “I ate noodles today,” Noah informed me.
• I frowned. Janet was a decent babysitter, but she was a lazy cook.
• I gave her an allowance each week for food and groceries, but she spent it all on microwaveable meals and instant noodles because that meant she could avoid cooking something nutritious.
• “Again?” I asked.
• “Uh-huh,” he replied.
• “I poured the packet in. Janet let me.” He was talking about the flavor packets that came with the instant noodles.
• I had already spoken to Janet about not feeding Noah those noodles last week.
• She had chosen to ignore me. The sad fact was that I was so hard up for a babysitter that I had no choice but to swallow my words half the time and accept certain things as necessary sacrifices.
• “What are you up to now?” I asked.
• “Watching TV,” Noah replied. Again, I gritted my teeth.
• “It’s after six, buddy,” I said gently.
• “You’re not supposed to be watching TV.”
• “But I wanna see the Ninja Turtles.”
• “Why don’t you play a game with Janet, instead?” I suggested, hoping to tempt him away from the television.
• “She’s sick today.”
• “What do you mean?”
• “Her head is hurting.”
• “She’s got a headache?” I asked.
• “Uh-huh.” I frowned, but I didn’t say anything else. Instead, I suppressed my reservations and put on a light tone.
• “I’m sorry I can’t be there to tuck you in tonight, kiddo… I’ll make it up to you, okay?”
• “Okay,” Noah said agreeably. I smiled.
• He was a sweet kid and was always ready to forgive.
• He had my dark brown hair and my blue eyes, and even at the age of four, he was a looker.
• I was intensely proud of him, but there were moments when parenting weighed heavily on my shoulders.
• “Goodnight, buddy.”
• “Goodnight, Daddy.” I hung up and sighed, wondering what I was going to do about Janet.
• It was obvious that she was unhappy babysitting, too. No matter how great the money was, it wasn’t making up for anything.
• She had come highly recommended.
• She even had a degree in child psychology, but I was starting to realize that all the qualifications in the world didn’t inspire a love for children or the ability to look after them properly.
• I changed my shirt and left my office.
• Kristen was still sitting behind her desk, her head poured over paperwork.
• She looked up when I passed.
• “Goodnight, sir,” she said.
• “Shouldn’t you have left at six?” I asked, realizing that she was usually gone by now.
• “I wanted to organize all the files for the Milton collaboration, sir,” she replied.
• “It’ll come in handy for the meeting next week.” Impressed with her work ethic, I gave her an approving nod.
• “You’ve been doing a really good job,” I told her.
• Her face ironed out into intense relief, and then she gave me a brilliant smile.
• Again, I noticed the dimple on her right cheek. When she smiled, she looked younger and more beautiful.
• “Thank you, sir,” she said.
• “I appreciate that.” “Not all my previous assistants have understood my military management style.”
• “Well, that’s understandable,” Kristen smiled.
• “Considering your background.”
• “Right,” I nodded awkwardly.
• “Well, anyway… I better get to my meeting.”
• “Of course. I’ll see you tomorrow, sir.” I nodded and headed out, wondering what it was about her that I was missing.
• She was uncommonly pretty, and I realized with a sharp pang that I found her very attractive.
• Perhaps that was it. Perhaps what I found unsettling about her was my feelings about her. Maybe it was nothing more than guilt.